The Whistling Wind Chapter 1: How One Feels

Chapter 1

How one feels

After watching the stars at night and hearing the whistling wind, my last thought before going to bed was.

‘Oh, Good God, why?

All I ask for is free will, stability, peace of mind, and a fair share of the resources. I can’t go on like this. It’s too much for my mind.

Why should I change who I am so I can survive in a world that is trying to destroy me for them to survive?

Other than my mother’s love for me, my mother and my mind are the only things I can trust. Lord, help me find the strength, Amen. Goodnight and sweet dreams.’

After a restless night, I wake to another morning. As always, the red London bus brakes furiously at the bus stop, and the engine roars away like a lion calling for its mate. The noise wakes me up for another mundane day.

It’s a lovely spring morning; birds are singing and fluttering, and cars are braking and stopping. The day’s rush is on, and the city’s need for cash begins.

I’m happy to be home, with no work to be done. Being unemployed is no joy; there are pure hopes, and it’s never won.

A confusing thought arises upon waking up, prompting a desire to engage in an activity for the day, but not that one. Feeling happy with oneself, yet still feeling empty, lost, and sad.

The most unusual thing about this morning is that my mind wants to write, when I never do.

So, I do as my mind tells me, like going to the bathroom; you feel the urge, you go. Or if you want a drink, you drink, because your mind tells you.

Hence, I sit and write without having previously considered the subject matter. 13th April 2009 (some dates referred to edited publications on a social media platform).

Where do I start?

At the beginning is always the best place. How would anyone understand unless I could prove it?

Finding something universal like mathematics. Having a question using the right formula, you will always be correct.

I was born on December 18, 1966, in Manchester, England, at St. Mary’s Royal Infirmary.

Christened Fitzroy Brian Edwards, I have many names; my workmates call me Fitz, while my close friends call me Eggy. Deejay Man Egg was the name I used when I first became a deejay, and later on, I became known as Deejay Fitz E.

My step-grandad, Mr. Ernest Walker, is the only person who calls me John because that’s what he wanted to name me. Since my father was never there, my step-granddad, whom I called Dad, was my influential father figure.

Although he held high morals and old-fashioned Jamaican principles. My grandad enjoyed a weekend drink at the Iron Duke, a local pub in Hulme. He was someone I looked up to with high regard and utmost respect.

At present, I’m an unemployed, time-served carpenter living in North London, Islington, for the past seven years. I was educated in the U.K. at a substandard level, holding a first B-Tec Diploma in business and finance, which has not significantly aided me in my chosen profession.

I love music and TV, and most importantly, I love people. People who don’t love me, and that’s the problem.

If it weren’t for love, we would not be here. What do I mean?

**Political Caring Policies**

Well, if Thatcher’s government did one thing, it was stabbing the socialist movement in the heart with capitalist ideals. This led to mismanagement of social needs, corruption, fraud, unemployment, and a total malfunction in social order.

The environment and the desire for resources lead to wars. Every man for himself, you’re on your own, kid, and survival of the fittest is the capitalist ideology in a free market, where one seeks to be number one.

A primitive train of thought is expressing a woman’s love, defensively and protectively, with self-contained greed, otherwise and scientifically known as the selfish gene. Social needs require a community to think and collectively provide for an individual’s essentials.

The main reason why I became a sole trade carpenter was that it seemed more profitable. It was also how the building industry moved and aligned with Thatcher’s government thinking.

A job I love to do, free, I thought, and independent. The result of my labour gave me a sense of achievement, knowing my work could stand for at least twenty years.

Yeah, I felt great at the end of the day, proud and happy to be alive. As always, there’s a spanner thrown into the works.

**Excused Corrupt Behaviour**

For example, the roof designer, the main carpenter contractor, and his sole trade carpenters mixed up their plans. Six subcontracted carpenters fitted the roof as planned, only to find that the drawings had been amended without informing them. Who bears the loss?

Subcontractors' rights under secular law are stacked against them, as they only receive their weekly wage. Employers can easily exploit loopholes in secular law to evade payment or default.

Even better, they can terminate the subcontractors and hire new staff. In this exercise, Magna Carta wins over Natural Law.

It’s incredible how communication skills play a crucial role in my profession: that and the fact that six to ten different companies could employ me in a year.

I’m often re-employed by past employers, but there isn’t any sense of long-term loyalty. I’m exposed to underhanded business deals, shortchanging, and a lack of respect for my social needs.

John T. Hope

By the time I had posted the above blog, I retired for the night, hoping to awake to another reality.